Everything started in 1998 when I read a book that was to open my conscience, a little inner gate through which I could see amazed a glitter ( this amazement hasn’t left me until today). To say more exactly, it was a mixture of joy and light which I had not been aware of until that moment. All these lasted for three months and all this time I hanged on reading again and again from this book hopping to experience again the moment of ecstasy which I felt in the beginning but all was in vain.

The fall was painful. The everyday life overwhelmed me in its ordinary way, with the mediocrity of the people around me. Nothing could give me consolation; neither the money, nor the people, nothing. I had become a seeker.

I started to read western philosophy, religion, psychology and one day I borrowed from the library a book about Buddha. Then I came to know about yoga, Upanishade , Vede, Brahman, Atman, Samkhya philosophy, reading all the time as I felt that it was the good direction, but still there was something that was missing: the meditation.

I bought books written by false gurus who promised the "sure" way to get the wanted purpose: Samadhi, Enlightenment but all was in vain. It didn’t work.

But let’s forget this hopeless seeking and come back two days before that day (the 4-th of April 2001) when walking down one of the streets in my town, I saw a Lady’s smiling face on a poster (Her name is SHRI MATAJI), together with an invitation to a certain hall in order to get Self Realization through a method called Sahaja Yoga. I went to that hall that very day and there I met a group of smiling people who recommended me to take out my shoes before the beginning of the experiment. I didn’t do it because of my western conditioned behavior but this was not an obstacle. A man stood up and spoke about Sahaja Yoga and explained me about the scheme of the subtle body, he talked about chakras, about Kundalini, about Sahaja Yoga, about SHRI MATAJI and added that Her picture gives cool vibrations. Then I did the experiment. When I finished I was asked if I felt a cool breeze coming out from my hands and above the fontanel bone area, but there was nothing. On the contrary, my hands had perspired. I felt them warm and above the head – nothing. They encouraged me and suggested me to check above the head of the person next to me and to my surprise, I felt a warm breeze coming out. That moment I thought I was far away from getting the enlightenment because it had not happened anything special as I expected: explosions of light, Nirvana, the void but I decided to go there once again, the next week. All this time I did what I was told to do: meditation in front of SHRI MATAJI’s picture ten minutes in the morning and ten minutes in the evening, with affirmations for my Kundalini.

In a short time I realized that peace was settled inside me, the thoughts didn’t disturb me all the time and I could immediately give up smoking. This gave me courage, although the distrust continued to persist because I couldn’t agree with the idea that my seeking finally ended, that I had found the answer in an ordinary place, in my town and there wasn’t necessary to accomplish my great plans of going in Shri Lanka to become a sanyasi and to meditate in front of a wall for years like Bodhidharma.

I continued in this way and the weekly meetings became almost daily ones, my individualism started to disappear by joining the collectivity and now, although I am aware of the fact that still there is a lot of work to do, I know that indeed I was given the enlightenment and all I have to do is to raise step by step being helped by the protection, compassion and love given to all of us by our Mother SHRI MATAJI NIRMALA DEVI.

JAY SHRI MATAJI !